This is the last year in another group of 10 that makes me
shudder. Yes, my age this year will end
with a “9”. I could sit back and fret
however, or I could choose to look on the brighter side.
A few
years ago I read about a woman who was turning 30. She lived in NYC with her husband, away from
close family and friends. She could have
been bummed, but instead, she took the day off work and bought 30 red
balloons. As she walked through the city
that day, she thoughtfully gave each balloon away with a smile. That story will always impress me. She gave on her birthday.
So, this
year I have had a pressing desire to do something worthwhile for my
birthday. I am not getting any younger,
and I certainly could stand to make a difference for good. The days are getting closer and as hard as I
have tried to come up with a great plan, nothing seemed to gel. I was checking out at the grocery store last
week when the cashier asked me if I had my discount card. As quickly as I responded, “No”, the woman in
line behind me whipped her card out and passed it to the clerk to give me the
discount. In a split second! It was like she was waiting for me to be
without it - and she was ready. I sincerely
thanked her - twice. I could tell she
had been ready before. It was second
nature to her. She just smiled. But as impressed as I was, I also realized
that I wanted to be that ready next time.
This
experience helped me decide on a plan. I
would live each day for 2 weeks, with the purpose of extending myself outside
my usual "box".
April 13:
As I
unloaded my yogurt and bananas onto the grocery store turn table, I recognized
the woman and her son who rolled their cart up behind me. I was pretty sure she didn’t have a clue who
I was. About then, there was a tugging
inside me that said, “Jody, here is your
chance. Go!” So I stepped towards her as she was unloading
her many bananas. I said, “I know you.
You are in my Weight Watchers group.” She responded, “Oh, Really?” Comparing our
similar purchases, I said, “Yep. I’m just glad I’m not buying M &M’s!” We all laughed. It felt good. Now when I see her, I can smile.
April 14:
Randy
and I attended a formal dinner. As we
visited with a co worker and her husband, we learned of their strong Catholic
faith and also the husband’s great interest in his ancestors. As I listened and encouraged him, I HAD to
put a plug in about the Family History Center in Mesa. I told him it was open to the public and
anyone is welcome there. I pretty much
begged him to go.
April 15:
Sundays are the days that make this
“outside the box” plan a necessity. I have always been a wallflower. (Unlike Randy who was born meeting, mingling,
and socializing.) I would rather stay
home in my box. But I read a talk by
Julie Beck recently. She talked about
her insecurity as a leader in the General Relief Society, and how she would
feel more comfortable at home in her kitchen:
“. . . It’s always with me, but I’ve become more comfortable
with how uncomfortable it is. The Atonement covers our ineffectiveness and
insufficiency's, and it’s my whole dependence on the Lord that makes it
possible for me to become more comfortable . . .”
So, at
the cookie event at the Bishops house tonight, I stood in the middle of
probably 100 kids and made small talk, getting to know their stories a little
better, and putting names with the faces I’ve seen so much. I now know the difference between Scott and
Chad, who I always thought were the same guy.
April 16:
I went
out on purpose today, to make a friend.
I only had an hour, and came home empty.
But as my piano lessons came one by one, I made more of an effort to encourage
them and listen to their stories of school, driver’s permits, tennis lessons,
choir, swimming, and homemade beaded bracelets.
April 17:
I was
aware of everyone around me today. I
passed a woman younger than me, who I won’t forget. She was slowly crossing the parking lot in my
opposite direction. She had a walker (from
a stroke), a limping leg that took her much effort to take steps, a bandaged
arm, and a determined look about her that said, “I think I can. I think I can.” She didn’t look at me, but I smiled
anyway. (Walkers are not new to me.) I wanted to hug her, but I didn’t. I just took a mental picture of her so I could
remember how hurting, and yet how strong she looked. I’m sure she would rather have been home, but
she was pushing herself.
I stood
in line at the check out again (a lot of stores in my life)! The woman behind me compared my items to
hers. We both decided we liked this
store better than the others. I tried my best to keep the conversation
going, since we’d be in line for a few minutes.
There was a lot to talk about. I
waved to her on my way out.
I went
into Sprouts and stood in the checkout line.
All of a sudden I became aware of the little woman behind me who was
trying desperately to grab the plastic divider bar. It was right in front of me, and I silently
scolded myself for not being “ready”.
During my “scolding” she bumped me with her cart as she was trying to
bend down with her short arms to retrieve a rolling cantaloupe. I hurried to help her, but she already had a
grip. I think I failed that test.
April 18:
After
Institute this morning, Katherine needed to run a couple of errands. I usually can, but today I had some banana
bread to deliver to Vita (and Henry and Jeff). I just needed to be back for piano at
1:00. We kept an eye on the clock and got
both of her stops made. She was very
thankful (she always is). And I had
plenty of time to drive out to see little Henry. All a Grandma needs is a peek. He is so precious!
I think I need to step up my efforts the next few days. I could be trying harder.
April 19:
I knew
I had to make a change today. I wanted
to have a more visible goal. I learned
of 2 of my best friends who had undergone surgery in the last 2 weeks. They would be my focus. I thought about baking, but knowing if they
are like me, they would be watching their girlish figures. No baking today. So, I kept thinking. . . I
ended up at Bath and Body and two flowery hand soaps later I was set. I wrote an anonymous note to each and left
them on their front doorsteps.
I also
had an unexpected chance to share my Mormon belief to a 6th grade
piano student today. She played “Happy
Birthday” and when I ask her if she had played it for anyone this week. She
said, (long pause) “Well . . . do you go to church?”
“Yes.”
(Now she was comfortable.)
“I played it for my youth leader at my church”, she said.
After a second or two, I asked, “What church do you go to?”
“ACC”, she replied.
“What church do you go to?”
“I’m a Mormon”.
“I thought you were a Christian”, she said.
“I am. The Church of
Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints”.
“Ohhhh”, she said.
“You have Joseph Smith who leads your church”.
I then explained that Joseph Smith was a tool in restoring
our church, but God and Jesus Christ are at the head. I don’t know where she is getting her
information, but she definitely knew enough to put
some pieces together –
quickly. And she’s only in the 6th
grade! She had obviously been in some
discussions before. It makes me nervous
just where.
April 20:
I made
arrangements with Mom to go out to Gilbert today. Carianne and Kate met me out there about 9:45
AM. We entertained each other with the
maze game, floor puzzle, ice cream and picking grapefruit. Carianne was able to help Dad with some
computer questions. About noon Carianne
and Kate had to get back home for lunch and nap.
I
stayed and had lunch with Mom and Dad (“skid row” chicken sandwiches!) and
watermelon. I visited with Dad for a
while. He was headed for the plant and
Mom and I were going to run errands. She
had a list. We bought a vacuum, got in
on some deals at Steinmart, picked up her wedding ring she had sized, and got
some ice cream. It was 4:30 when I
headed for home. She kept saying, “Are
you sure you have time to do all this?”
I assured her I did. It was kind
of nice not to have to hurry back for piano or something less meaningful. It was a nice day.
April 21:
Today
we got an early start with work around here (especially Randy). He reminded me about the ward’s temple
session at 2:30. So we hurried
around. The temple was nice. I made a seat for Mandy. There were probably 6 or 7 girls and 3 or 4
guys. As I sat there, I realized that I
was in the midst of worthy single girls who hadn’t had the privilege of
marriage yet. They were promising the
same things I was promising. It helped
me know that those blessings are for worthy saints, married or not. I was humbled by their strength.
We
watched Kate tonight. The grocery store
is a whole new fun experience with her. She
also went with us to a wedding reception at Desert Breeze Park. There were lots of people from our home ward
that we miss so much, and it was perfect for Kate! We took time to swing on every swing. I vote for receptions at the park!
April 22:
We had
wonderful meetings today. Those young
single adults are sleeping giants. I
never cease to be amazed.
We had
Mom and Dad, Gregg and Rachael, and Carianne, Rusty, and Kate over for
dinner. Our neighbor had dropped by a
huge bag of chopped lettuce and many huge tomatoes. (She works for the food services at the
School District.) So, we made a mean
salad bar. It was yummy! Thanks to our nice neighbor, we’ll have salad
for a week! Mom and Dad were glad to be
a part. They always are.
April 23:
I
dropped off 6 big boxes of receipts we’d saved for years to a shredding event
in Chandler today. This was about the 4th
day of over 100 degree temperature. On
the way over, the radio advised people to be smart by keeping a gallon of water
in their cars for the summer heat. When
it was my turn to be helped, I opened my doors and a young (sweaty) man “heave
hoed” every box out. (No wonder he was
so hot and sweaty, with customers like me!)
I said, “Do I pay you?” But
considering the long lines of cars waiting patiently, so as not to stop the flow,
he said, “No, that’s OK.” So, I called
the company to make sure they knew I appreciated his hard work, and it turned
out to be the owner! I was
impressed. Another lesson learned.
Then,
on my way home I couldn’t help but notice sweaty bikers and hot pedestrians,
just like the shredder man. So I drove
to the grocery store and purchased 8 gallons of drinking water, to be kept in
each of our family’s 2 cars. You just
never know how water in these summer days is going to help you or somebody
else. The kids were coming over for
leftovers (remember the unlimited salad) and I gave a short lesson about the
Good Samaritan, encouraging them to share their water, or be prepared in case
of an emergency.
April 24:
I’m
proud of my habit to wave and verbally acknowledge fellow walkers in the
mornings. It comes naturally now. I must say that everyone responds back with a
positive greeting.
Today
was orange day for lunch. I had made
plans with Kate to come over for lunch and eat only orange food. We made orange jello the night before so she
could look forward to it. On the way
back from picking her up, we were recalling all the food that was orange. Cheetos was worth making a quick stop at the
store. We ran in (because I had warm
macaroni and cheese and bisquits waiting).
We bought Cheetoes and Cheezits and Donald Duck orange juice. A 75 year old woman rolling her cart by
herself, noticed Kate coming her way down the aisle. The woman stopped and stepped toward Kate and
told her how pretty she was, her beautiful hair, eyes, and skirt, and on and
on. It was so refreshing to stop and
let this woman rave over Kate. Kate
stood quietly and listened to her. When
she was through, I prompted her to say “Thank-you”. It was sweet.
By just looking at Kate, she had brightened this woman’s day (maybe
Kate’s, too!). As we wished her a good
day, I realized how rushed we usually are.
It was nice to soak in the beautiful compliments. I will try harder next time to make greetings
more worthwhile - whether receiving or giving.
The
door knocked as we were eating. We ran to see Jeff, Vita, and Henry standing there. What a wonderful surprise! Carianne and I got to hold that precious boy!
April 25:
I find
myself being more consciously aware of people around me. The smiles, the “Thank-yous”, the “Have a
good day”’s, the waves.
April 26:
Birthday.
I received many phone calls and
greetings today. It was nice. I know people rearranged their schedules to
make an effort for me. It does make a
person feel good! Thank you SO
much. (What is it about birthdays that
make you never too old to exclaim, “That’s my birthday!”?)
I took Hairy in to be groomed
today, with my $5.00 off coupon. When I
picked her up, I turned around and tipped the girl the $5.00 I might have
saved. She was overly appreciative. We both felt good.
Maybe this year will be a landmark year
because of a stronger desire to make a difference. This little experiment has taught me that we
are all human. Everyone deserves to be
acknowledged and valued. I started out dreaming of making a big difference, but I really didn’t
change my life style too much. I just
paid more attention. I still want to be
ready to whip out my discount card for fellow customers in need. And I still want to try harder to put myself
in a short person’s shoes when she reaches for a rolling cantaloupe. I'm ready.
. . . Let the year begin!
